Yesterday I had a tiny conversation (I think of texts as just that) that made me think on the way it made me feel confused and disheartened. It was between two writers. One who had been writing their book for 3 plus years and one who wrote and published their book in thirteen months.
I was in disclaimer mode all day in my thoughts, sorting out all kinds of reasons why my book got on a shelf so quickly and she is in the querying stage (looking for an agent who will look for a publisher who may publish the book in six months or five years). It doesn't make me a better writer at all; I am sure of this. I'm a nube, and I'm ok with it.
Don't misunderstand me, especially if you've read my book! I could have, and maybe you say: should have, taken 3 years to write it, carefully going over every word choice and refining every scene. But after a few trips through my book I realized with a sickening heart I will never be happy with it, it will never be perfect. I could do that forever because every time I write I am a better writer.
It made me sad to think that someone may think that I figured I had written a book worthy enough to merit publishing. Somehow I am "moxie" enough to self publish and see to it my book lands in a bookstore (albeit on consignment) and the library. What gall, what audacity... How do I dispel any myths that I think I have arrived?
I finished my day watching authortube, and the first video was Michael LaRonn (a prolific writer in indie publishing) answering questions. In clarifying the way he gets so many books out he says he does not subscribe to "letting your book age" as advised by Steven King but instead "The book you write is an indicator of your talent at that point in time" apparently something Dean Wesley Smith says (over 100 works traditionally published and 100 works indie published—Men in Black being one of them).
My ears tickle, I'm listening.
Down the rabbit hole I jumped. As soon as I looked up Dean Wesley Smith, I found Heinlein then from there his 5 Rules:
You must write
You must finish what you start
You must refrain from rewriting except to editorial order
You must put it on the market
You must keep it on the market
No way! It must be a personality trait in productivity. I followed the rules I didn't even know existed. That just takes the mystery right out of it. It also takes out the romantic idea that in order to be an author you must labour over a piece for years on end and suffer rejections until at last your first book lands on a shelf and doesn't sell and then you become the starving artist.
By the way, those are not my dreams.
So get the idea out of your head. Just because an author pumps out the books doesn't mean they're garbage—although they could be garbage. But it is possible AND acceptable to write good, publish many works, and be prolific. That sounds appealing to me!
So now here's my disclaimer: I will write my best and as much as I can and often as I can, and it will be my best work at that point in time. And if it's prolific, I will not apologise. I'm not sorry for enjoying my life, moving on, and having moxie.